Teen Sexual Health

Adolescence is a time of many new experiences and decisions, including those related to romantic relationships and the onset of sexual interest. Adolesence can be a very confusing time as youth become increasingly independent from their families and start making more and more decisions on their own. Faced with many different messages and options, it's not easy to make decisions that one is happy with or that support one's health.

One tool that can help youth make the best choices possible is an awareness of their personal values and the ability to use this information as a "guidance system" or compass for decision-making. Equally important is helping youth appreciate their own values while respecting that others may have different values.

"Values" refer to the principles, beliefs, and qualities that are most important to someone in life. They serve as an internal guidance system, telling us about how we see the "rightness" and "wrongness" of things. Generally, when our behaviour and choices are in line with our values, we feel good about ourselves and what we have done. On the other hand, when our choices and behaviours do not reflect our values, we tend to feel bad about ourselves and the situation.

Values are very personal. No two people have exactly the same set of values. Values are shaped by our experiences and understandings of those experiences through what we've learned from our families, cultures, religion, school, media, etc. As we grow and change, so too can our values.

Articulating our values is not always easy. Most often we learn our values in subtle ways and are not often asked to reflect on or define them. All too often, we become aware of our values only after something contradicts them. Or, we may be aware of our values and still find it difficult to make choices based on these values because of external pressures or circumstances.

In our research in the Parkgate Teen Sexual Health Project, we found that young woman were more able to articulate their values and beliefs than young men. In fact, young men based their decisions primarily on the attractiveness of potential partners instead of what they believed would be best for them on an emotional level. At the same time, young women encountered much external pressure-particularly around social acceptance-that made it challenging for them to base their decisions on their values.

All too often, sexual decisions are made in the heat of the moment. Taking the time to think about who we are as a person and what's right for us can help us to make the best choices possible. Understanding our values and making value-based decisions is good for all people, whether they are sexually active or not. Indeed, choosing when and with whom to initiate romantic and sexual relationships is a very important decision.

It's also important that teens understand that decision-making is an on-going process. It's okay to make different decisions with different people, and even with the same person in different circumstances. Just because you have made a certain decision once does not mean that you must always make the same decision.

This module is designed to give teens the opportunity to clarify their values and to develop a framework for using their values to make healthy decisions. The following are some tips to help create a comfortable environment for self-exploration.

• People often feel very strongly about personal and family values. It's important to create an environment of respect and openness. Refer back to the ground rules if strong emotions and polarization emerge.
• Remind everyone that values are a personal way of seeing the world. There are no right and wrong answers. Encourage participants to speak from their own perspective when explaining their values and why they are important to them. Remind them that it's okay for someone else to think differently from the way they do. At the same time, emphasize that there are some values, such as non-discrimination, supported by Canadian laws.
• Support the participants' curiosity about other people's values and encourage them to avoid wanting people to believe the same thing they do. Support participants who share values that are not reflected by the majority of the group.
• Remind everyone that many people have difficulties articulating what their values are. It's not important to figure everything out right now or to be 100% certain of your values. It's important for youth to consider their options and to pay attention to what they feel is right.
• Be aware of your own values and try to facilitate the workshop from a place of nonjudgement. Be aware of whether you are supporting values that are in line with your own more than those that are not.
• Where appropriate, be open to sharing your own values, how you learned them, and how you've used them to guide your decisions.
• Avoid sharing values about highly controversial topics. Doing so may cause the workshop to stray from its objective.